Mommy Confessions: I Got Nothin'

Last night was rough.

I was supposed to teach voice lessons, but my student got tickets to see a Cirque du Soleil show here in town. Lucky girl I tell ya!

So just as I am about to leave work I get a phone call from Momm, who had kindly helped me out by picking up Boomer from school.

Boomer was in the background screaming her head off.

Then she lied to me about her behavior at school.

*Side note, I could never figure out how my mother ALWAYS knew when I was lying. Last night though as soon as the words left Boomer's lips I knew they weren't true. It's like this totally awesome Mom Super Power!*

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She hung up on me. Twice.

I got to Momm's house and realized the entire freak out was because Boomer didn't feel like doing her homework, and had lied to mom saying she had none.

After a very stern talk about telling the truth and trust, I sat down at my mother's dining room table with Boomer to do her homework. After about 20 minutes of tears, 1 Barbie taken away, 1 stuffed animal taken away, and the loss of TV privileges indefinitely, she finally calmed down enough to finish her homework. 

I am convinced this is some sort of karmic payback for the many times I sat at the same table bawling my eyes out with my mother. Momm...I'm SO SO SO SO SO sorry.

*When I'm writing about my mother I always spell 'mom' with an extra 'm'. Its an homage to my teen years when I always referred to her in my very annoyed angsty teen voice as 'Moooooommmmmm'.*

Then it was time for dinner and another round of tears because we told her she couldn't have potato chips unless she ate a sloppy joe sandwich first. (She finally ate it, and got her chips.)

I finally got her home and got her to bed.

I went to bed about 10pm. For whatever reason woke up at 12am and spent the next 4.5 hours obsessing about money and bills. I actually got up out of bed and looked at every single transaction from the last 30 days and categorized it in my banks tracking tool. I mean, who does that at 2am? 'Oh I can't sleep, let me just get up and budget.' Because its not at all stressful to look at money two days BEFORE payday. 

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So today I have a headache. I'm tired as all get out. Oh and I just got an email from Boomer's teacher telling me she hasn't been eating her lunches. Because I packed 'the wrong peanut butter'.

By nature I am a 'wallower'. I get in a mood or a funk and I just wallow. Kind of like Eeyore. Its not one of my more redeeming character traits, and its definitely something I'm trying to overcome. So I had a few conversations with trusted friends this morning.

My cousin who reminded me that Boomer is A LOT like me. I have to just keep working with her. She's adjusting and things will level out.

My bestie, who reminded me to consider where I was last year at this time. Even if I'm broke, I'm happier.

My work wife, who reminded me that its Greek Platter Day at work. Hummus makes everything better.

So I'm going to put on my big girl panties and deal. Not wallow.

If anyone has any suggestions on how to manage Boomer through this whole not eating/tantrum throwing I'm SO open to that. At the rate she is losing toys and privileges she will basically be living in a nun's cloister soon.